There are 3 things that can trigger things which happens in your life. They are called motivation. What are they?
The first one is fear. this is the most common ones. Fear of being lonely, fear of being hungry, fear of rejection, fear of having no money, fear of punishment, etc.
The second one is hope. Hope for a better life, hope for a better career, hope for more money, etc
The last and best one is love or passion. this is the ultimate motivation. if we do things with love, then we have no pressure, no stress. that is pure love, no hope and no fear.
In terms of relationship or marriage, some people get married for the wrong reason. for example: they get married because they are afraid of being lonely, or pressure from the parents/friends, or they get married because they hope to be happier, or other false hopes upon the couple. this will not be a healthy marriage because the motivation is not sincere.
Sometimes because of our “habit”, we do things without considering the motivation anymore. such as working or being in a relationship for a while. so how do we know the true motivation?
We have to stop doing it. stop the regular activities and start doing the opposite. that way, you can feel why you were doing it in the first place. If you dont know your motivation of working, try taking a leave and see if you miss doing your job. If you dont know your motivation in your relationship, try taking a break. stop seeing him/her, stop contacting him/her, and see if you miss him/her. you can try look deep inside you, see where your subconcious mind going.